30 Memories!

(Decorated by my Niece)

They say it's my birthday, and I turn 30......So since I'm still in denial; here is a fun way to celebrate.

1980-Adopted on May 20th, 1980
1981-Playing with my brothers
1982-all I got is a big smile
1983-Big Girl Bed
1984-I was a witch for Halloween
1985-Big Wheel Races/Naturalization.U.S. Citizen
1986-I was in the Journal Star/Dance Recitals
1987-still in blow up wings to swim
1988-I come in handy with a drill;building a deck
1989-Disney World after Appendicitis Appendectomy
1990-First Softball team
1991-Washington D.C. band trip
1992-I played the Coronet
1993-Still Daddy's little girl at 13
1994-I can ski down the bunny hill/And I bought my first 10speed bicycle
1995-Broke 3200M relay record at Peoria Heights
1996-Ran Cross Country
1997-Re-dedicated my life to Christ
1998-Trip to Russia--A friend wrote me 10 letters/devos.(I still own them)
1999-1st College Course
2000-First Experience of dorm life
2001-Traditional Fishing trips to Branson w/my Dad
2002-Trip to England
2003-first date...nope not true...Umm..Maybe b/c I still play in the sandbox
2004-I cut my hair short...AHHH
2005-Bachelor's Degree from Eureka College
2006-1st real Job/Bethany Baptist is my home church
2007-Baptized in the Jordan River
2008-Took 5 girls to State in Jr. High and they medal ed
2009-Another trip to Palestine, Israel/I read through the Old Testament
2010-Started Master's Program...am I nuts

This is fun

These 3 little words are going to haunt my life forever...Want to know the story, ask my friend Jill. I think I just about had to call an ambulance to go to her house before she choked to death over my words "this is fun" on the phone.

Update:
My Master's program is going well. I have had 3 full weeks and almost at the halfway mark of this class. It has been great getting to know classmates from other states, and I think one lives in Hawaii. But they have been encouraging as they comment on my discussion posts, and our Prof. makes us laugh with her dyslexia. And her comments to our posts are encouraging as well as funny. She plays the devils advocate quite often but makes solid, encouraging comments to help us succeed.

I guess I can say that I believe those words that it will be easier as an adult. I know more, and write well. Though, I have to say that this first APA style paper could have gone either way and then I would have proven my point on my writing skills. But God knows the bigger picture and He's always faithful.

Dr. Pepper Test

So I didn't take this test on purpose...
Last week I headed to Panera to write a excruciating paper that was due that night at midnight. No( I did not wait till the last minute, that was 3 out of 3 papers I had to write for the week). So I drank 2 glasses of Dr. Pepper. What you must know is that caffeine has never affected me at night. But I guess after being up till 2am, that I have discovered it does.

So again, Dr. Pepper was drank on Monday...yes, I was home writing papers all day and had 1 glass and finished it off at dinner time. Little did I know that was going to keep me up till midnight.

The result...No Dr. Pepper after dinner.

Leaping into Failure

It's not as easy or productive as I thought this schooling would be. Week 1 turned out well. Week 2 has proved to be a struggle, and one that I'm not overcoming very well. I thought I had a good handle on it, but tonight I have other thoughts.
I've heard lots of "why did you wait till the last minute words this week. You should have stayed home all weekend and wrote your paper. I'm gonna do this and that while you write a paper." I've heard words of well, it's your responsibility. Totally encouraging I know. I'm full of tears 2 nights in a row. Tonight, I am feeling the pressure. I've been working since Thursday on these 3 papers. 2 of them are written. I forgot how to write a compare and contrast paper. But when you don't understand what your writing on, I just keep repeating myself. Can I forfeit 4 pts. and make them up later in the game?A 1000wd essay and a 500 essay together equal 4 pts. Sheesh, that seems so fair. Can someone please take me back to 8th grade, where I can learn this? I hate this class I'm in. I feel as if I'm not really learning and going through the motions of setting myself up for failure.
I need more strength and motivation, and help. I need more sleep, I need more and more of positive influence in my life. I need to end week 2 so I can start fresh on week 3 and forget this frustrating, humiliating, paper I have to write.

It's Here!!!

As I look at this picture, I see me trying to climb this ice mountain, yet possibly falling down(Which in reality, is exactly what happened)
But as a believer in Christ, I know that my faith is stronger, and I can hold on, even if I am slipping. It's a new day, with new challenges, and new habits of life. It's all a new beginning as I make this climb. I don't know if I'm going to fall or if I'm going to climb further. I'm praying my way through, that God leads me further up the hill.
On to bigger and better things in life...Pursuing a Master's.
The dream is big. I want to see and feel the warmth of Christ's love as I trust Him with my future. The future looks unknown, but the journey of walking with Christ and growing stronger as a believer is worth the cost.

Hands

Make the paths straight before my feet Lord. My world is shaken, and my heart is breaking. I will never leave your hands, Oh Lord. God I trust you. There is a raging sea in front of me, and I am feeling lost. But I am following you in faith.

This just had to be the theme today on my way to work, I think I had listened to 3 songs about holding on to God's hands and his hands are leading me, and holding me still. I could quote several lines on those songs that spoke to my unmotivated heart today...though coffee, and study hall, and just a whirlwind of activities did not seem to motivate my heart much more, but I know that God is wrapping his arms around me.
I ended the day with this---"Count it all joy"
by Shannox Wexxelberg. Way to go Pastor Ritch, for pouring God's word in my heart this week. All I needed for so long, was found in the small book of James.

I'm in His Hands ---Phil Laeger
Your Hands---JJ Heller

Heartfelt prayers

Almost a week straight of Prayers, and my heart is healing from the pain of the past, and I am beginning to feel the peace. Am I scared, absolutely. Am I scared of the unknown-Yes. Do I feel at times I can't do it--yes. But God has it all in his hands, and He is a Sovereign God.


---My heart is heavy burdened and I am needing your peace and comfort. I admit I choose to walk my own path. I choose my plan. You have a greater plan for me Oh, Lord. And as I'm reminded by Jill's thoughtful words. Greater is he who walks in the Lord than in the world. There is abundance of joy to those who walk in your name. I need my life to reflect you name.

---Why is it that we always want what we do not have. There is always something as in money, marital status, in our families, friends, anything can make the jealousy strong. I want to love my life, I want to see it as a gift. Sometimes we don't see what lies beneath the snow. There are things unseen because God has a greater plan. We need to trust where we are in life now, and give God the glory. He knows it all---God is at work, we cannot see what He is always doing or His purposes. God's ways may not make sense to me. I'm am praying that I'll have a God-centered life.
---I feel like these changes are hard and I'm not strong enough. I'm scared God. I need to be strong. I need to have more faith. I need to hold on tight, because life is moving faster than I can handle right now. All I can do right now is cry. I feel like I don't know where to turn. The future looks unkown. I've been fighting you God and I no longer want a battle. Hold my hand tight cause I need the strength to keep going.


From Him are all things. He is the source of our existence. To resent or resist my circumstances is to resent God himself. In other words put by my friend Jenny, that if I am not willing to obey, then why would I recieve His blessings? A true woman lives a God-centred life---for His glory; God centered purpose. A true woman trusts God. He has a plan and His plan will not be voided. A true woman says yes Lord. I wan to live my life intentionally with a purpose to give God all glory.